I’m really late in posting this review so I must apologise, I’ve been a very busy Kitty (not that I’m complaining!) but better late than never eh? A couple of Friday’s ago the scales were lifted from my virtual eyes and I witnessed a virtual bedroom revolution, which is not nearly as kinky as it sounds! I received an invite to attend an event hosted at INSTINCT. This was a name that wasn’t familiar to me, and then I discovered that the design team were the same people behind CORN. If you aren’t familiar with CORN make yourself a cup of tea and bugger off in world now, and come back when you are…(Click here). Back? Good. Corn (Named after the proprietor, Cornelius Sloat) is an *infamous* design house in world. Think funky modern styling with a focus on bold colourful design and intricate detailing. (It’s the kind of stuff that Amanda and Fukmi have in their home, which is a veritable palace. Cowbags.) I have indulged myself in the past, and I own a couple of corking desks and a coffee machine from there which are irreplaceable to me. The coffee machine in particular is a wee work of prim art. Anyways, Friday night comes along and as per usual, Kitty doesn’t have a date. Kitty is abandoned and all alone in world, whilst Jez battles orcs and twats steaming purple monsters with smoke flaring out of their nostrils in World of Warcraft. A typical Friday evening in our house then. But, having got ever-so-slightly fed up of having to visit places on my own and even more fed up of looking like a billy-no-mates with a serious BO problem I enlisted the help of my chum, Professor Preminger, to accompany me, knowing that if the event turned out to be not-so-hot then at least I’d be guaranteed some scintillating conversation. The professor is a well cultured older gentleman after all…Once we arrived we were a bit lost as to where the event was being held, until we were whisked into a sky box by Devon Fischer, Cornelius’s business and SL partner (lovely lass) Having never met Mr Sloat before I was a bit apprehensive, I mean this is a chap who holds a highly enviable reputation across the grid and it’s enhanced by the fact that he obviously doesn’t eat ugly-muffins. (Readers-He’s a bit on the tottylicious side!) I needn’t have worried though, Cornelius was lovely; totally sans ego and extremely friendly. I confess dear reader that I was drooling a tad into my keyboard, but seeing as my tooth is a bit dodgy it could have been that. Ahem.
So, there we were, chatting away in a beautiful red velvet lined skybox to the star of the show but we still had no idea what we were actually there for. Plus there was barely anyone else in the room, which kind of alarmed me.I mean this was a very exclusive launch of something fabulous, so where was everyone? Not only that, why were there two very attractive people in their underwear in the corner? Fortunately more invited guests appeared (rather stunning ladies they were too, the Professor was very happy) and as if by magic the skybox we were in was filled suddenly with seating, champagne and a stage area…
With a bed on it.
“Oh shit!” I thought as I took my seat, “It’s going to be a bloody Amsterdam style sex show!” I was feeling *really* uncomfortable at this point, because the Professor, although a very good friend of mine both in Second Life and real life too, wasn’t perhaps the most appropriate companion for me to sit with and watch such shenanigans. Besides, as an older avatar I had visions of his virtual pacemaker packing in…Can you imagine how I’d have felt if LeapyLee had tagged along? Oh don’t even go there..all kinds of wrong. Anyway, I took a very deep breath and waited for the ‘performance’ to start.
Cornelius and Devon appeared on the stage and began a very professional presentation. About animated sex beds. Seriously!
It was at this point that I stopped squirming and listened, and realised that this wasn’t going to be tacky or sleazy at all, in fact what was being said made perfect sense. You see, it occurred to them that the sex beds in Second Life were pretty bog-standard. You get what you pay for, and the majority seem to be all animation with little or no aesthetic quality to them. In other words, about as erotic as naked mole rat. To be fair I do own a couple of very nice ‘special’ beds that I’m more than happy with;both are four posters and look very pretty . However, the ‘intimate’ poses in both are the same bog standard inny-outy-uppy-downy-thrusty-woohoo jobs that you see all over the grid, even though I purchased them from two entirely different locations. ( Please note: Not that I ever get to use them, seeing as his- nibs is never in blinking Second Life..grrr)So Corn and Devon have decided to reinvent, or at least reinterpret the wheel and make their own ‘happy finish’ beds..and we were about to get a demonstration.
The two beautiful semi-naked models that I’d spotted earlier took to the stage and adopted their positions..and it was *lovely*. As Cornelius pointed out, and I for one agree entirely, the one thing that is sorely lacking in a lot of these beds are, to be blunt, foreplay animations. It’s like that scene in the school in Monty Python’s ‘The Meaning of Life’, where John Cleese and his wife are demonstrating coitus to a bunch of very embarrassed students. If you want to be a virtual lover par excellance, you need to get the virtual juices flowing, and the best way to do this? A bit of a cuddle and a snog obviously! Well, that’s what we were shown..the menus in the bed incorporate a vast array of animations to enjoy before you get all down and dirty ( 36 different ones in total) PLUS, all of these animations have been specially designed and are exclusive to the Instinct range. I was pleasantly surprised to see that what was being demonstrated was intimate and rather special..perfect for lovers. It’s true that there is very little in the way of embraces and snoggathons built into sex furniture with most animations aimed solely towards the main event. Instinct redresses that balance completely and then some..and another thing that I really liked was that these beds are great because if you just want a kiss and a cuddle or a cosy chat then that’s exactly what you can have..they don’t add any pressure. Just like in real life if you want to get into bed and cuddle to sleep then that’s what you can do here too. Romantic huh? Of course if you want to rip each others clothes off and have a virtual bonking frenzy then you can do that as well, and trust me you’ll have a very good time doing it on one of these! Needless to say I was very impressed, and then we were invited to the main showroom to explore further and see this new range in its entirity. My goodness, it’s stunning. It looks like you’ve walked into a real-life showroom, because the lighting and the layouts are exactly what you would expect in a real life environment. I had a major Kittygasm…and not because I had sat on a ‘special’ bed….but because we were surrounded by some of the most beautiful furniture that I have ever seen on the grid, and if that wasn’t enough, some of the bedroom layouts came with bathrooms that are to absolutely die for. Veritable design heaven. I left the Professor to it, as he was being fawned all over by the majority of the female guests in attendance, and went off to explore the showrooms. I ended up changing into my undies so that I could take some pictures and just enjoy myself, after all this is what it’s about isn’t it? As I wandered around I got a feeling of deja vu and then realised that a lot of the designs seemed very familiar. I’ve seen similar items in Habitat and Ikea, but that’s not a bad thing if you ask me. There are so many beautiful furniture pieces in the world that I want but could never possibly afford, so stores like Instinct help to make my dreams *almost* come true. Why? Well because you can kit your home out a lot more cheaply in the virtual than you can in the real world, so in effect you can have the house of your dreams without the hefty price tag! BUT that’s not to say these items are cheap. Alas, they are a bit on the pricey side…but you do get an absolute wad of loveliness for your dosh. It’s true that quality costs. If you decide to buy, you’ll find that the Instinct wares are sold in complete sets, so not only do you get a wonderful bed, but you also get all the components that make up a room display. That means more for your virtual dollar :additional furniture, lighting and artwork. If you’re in the market to buy new furniture then make no mistake, these are some of the best modern-style new releases I have seen to date in Second Life. The designs are textured to perfection, and with detailing like blankets half strewn across the bed and scatter cushions just ready for you to virtually sink into them it’s impossible not to fall in love. Lovely finishing and careful attention to detail means that when you zoom in to have a good look there’s nothing to complain about…BUT I do think that at L$5k for a bedroom set (not all are the same price I hasten to add) no matter how fabulous, it’s going to be a real stretch to afford these furnishings for most grid inhabitants, which means that they’re perhaps aimed at a more elite clientele. If modern cutting edge design is your bag then Instinct probably has what you’re after at a price… My suggestion? Go to Instinct and indulge in trying everything out, and then start saving your virtual pennies. It may take you *months* but trust me, it’ll be worth it!  Click HERE to transport directly to the virtual fabulousness that is Instinct’s store.